Maybe we should stop trying to be so damn happy

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Sometimes, being ‘happy’ just doesn’t make sense. I’d say that most of the time, I’m happy. Sometimes I’m not so happy — maybe a degree or two short of it — but I can consciously get to that happy place. (I’m getting better at this. It’s always nice when I can do it.)

But there are times when I’m just not happy. Maybe I happen to be in the middle of a flying shitstorm that can happen in life and being happy would be too big of an emotional jump from being outraged.

Or how about those other times when nothing much is going on? When I’m just moving about my day doing mundane tasks? Should I have a huge smile on my face the whole time? Should I prance around in utter elation 24/7?

Happy? Nah. Not right now.

How about this?…

Try being comfortable.

Something I’ve been working on lately is to just get comfortable in the moment.

This is a great thing to be able to do. To surrender to the present situation and sit with life for a bit. To surf that huge wave or to just hang out and enjoy the sun on a flat day — whatever conditions you’re amidst, just be present to it.

To just take a moment of reprieve in the middle of the day, look around us, breathe in whatever air we can, feel our extremities, and just… be… comfortable.

Sink in. Settle. Be present. Get our posture situated, relax our shoulders, and shake hands with the movement our life has taken.

Even if we’re angry. Even if we’re taking a stand or have placed ourselves in the middle of an uncomfortable situation. Even if we’re just, kinda… hanging out.

Try at least starting with comfortable.

Maybe comfortable is a good enough step.


Jonas shares short, whimsical daily meditations here at Higher Thoughts and around the web. To get them delivered straight to your inbox as soon as they’re live, click here.

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Here’s to you, Wayne Dyer


Wayne Dyer was my gateway drug to the world of metaphysics and personal development.

It was 2003. Maybe 2004. My dad asked me to watch this special he’d watched earlier on PBS from an author he really liked.

So we turned it on. There before me on the screen stood this bald older man, waxing lucidly about his new book, The Power of Intention.

And there I was. For over an hour. Utterly captivated the whole time.

He was a heretic. In that one short hour, he called out so many of the old, outmoded, negative religious beliefs that I’d heard so much growing up. Not so much from my parents, but from the world at large.

He spoke about Life/God/Spirit in a way that a certain part of me always knew to be true, but that I could never put into words.

I immediately went out and bought every book of his that I could get my hands on.

I had serious work to do. I was in my mid-twenties and had lost my mom to breast cancer a decade or so earlier. Plus, there was a whole slew of other nonsense from childhood that I needed to work through. Wayne Dyer’s work took me by the hand and guided me through it.

When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.
-Wayne Dyer

His work also lead to a slew of other authors who added to this spiritual transformation in my life. From Marianne Williamson to Michael Beckwith to Ernest Holmes to Neale Donald Walsch and Ram Dass. My bookshelves are packed with the stuff now, as is my consciousness.

My dad died a few years ago. Thinking back, my most enjoyable days with him are when we’d sit and drink coffee while watching Wayne Dyer YouTube videos (or ones that he’d download from Bit Torrent — sorry, Wayne, but I know you’re cool with it).

I can credit Wayne Dyer for the reason I do this work.

I remember reading his book, There’s A Spiritual Solution to Every Problem. In it, he talks a lot about writing and his creative process. As I was reading it, I had a strong inkling that I wanted to do that. I wanted to share these gifts through writing that had helped me so much (no, I don’t have his stage presence).

Although I put it off for about ten years, here I am. Sharing with you, daily, my little quips and thoughts that I’ve picked up along the way. Some from him. Some from others (who he’s probably referenced). Some from who knows where.

If I could write him a personal note right now (heck, I guess I can), here’s what I’d say:

Wayne, you brought the light. You tore the shutters off a wounded, insecure, motherless young man’s dark inner world and reintroduced him to the light switch. I’m saddened I can never physically shake your hand and thank you for your work as I’d wished to do since the day your words began rewiring my consciousness right there in my living room. But I know you’re somehow reading these words now, along with all the others that are pouring in right now, and that will have to suffice.

Here’s to you, Wayne Dyer. And here’s to whatever adventures you face next.


If you enjoyed this piece, proclaim your love to the world by recommending it below. Thanks!

Jonas writes short daily essays and meditations here at Higher Thoughts. To get them delivered straight to your inbox as soon as they’re live, click here.