Why I’m scared

Image: paul morris

I’m scared because I write.

I’m scared because I’ve chosen a path where I share publicly, every day.

I’m scared because one day it caught on and some people actually started paying attention.

I’m scared because I always thought this would be awesome — not scary.

I’m scared because it is awesome, but the fear has risen in-step with the awesomeness.

I’m scared because it seems people perceive in me a position of authority of sorts.

I’m scared because I’m expected to know answers.

I’m scared because every day I realize more answers I don’t know.

I’m scared that I’ll disappoint you, and you may leave and never come back.

I’m scared because I told the world I was studying to become a minister.

I’m scared because this ingrains my fears above.

I’m scared because now, I’m REALLY supposed to know the answers.

I’m scared because I like to tell stories, but fear my stories will let people down because they aren’t… Answers.

I’m scared because my fears are self-obsessive passing thoughts, but I’ve just told everyone, so now they’re documented facts.

I’m scared because tomorrow I’ll be fine.

I’m scared because tomorrow, maybe I won’t.

I’m scared because I’m becoming a ‘Jesus person’.

I’m scared because ‘Jesus people’ have never settled well with me.

I’m scared because I don’t want to become that kind of Jesus person.

I’m scared, but I know that fear is a couple clicks better than apathy.

I’m scared because I create.

I’m scared and I want you to know that you can be scared too.

And tomorrow, I promise to show up, just as scared as always.


🌮 For between the price of a taco and a nice dinner per month, you can support Higher Thoughts. Click here to become an investor. ❤️


Jonas writes short daily stories and preachments on the daily here in Higher Thoughts. Get one to enjoy with your coffee every morning by subscribing below.

https://upscri.be/0369ff/