After the fallout

Image: Ismael Nieto

You know how, when you have a huge blowout fight with someone you love?… Tempers have erupted, some tears may have fallen, perhaps a few broken dishes strewn about the kitchen floor?

And then… There’s quiet. Sometimes preluded by a slamming of a door and muffled sobs into a distant pillow.

This is the moment after the fallout. You’ve expressed your anger, as they have. Your heart starts to slow down. Your shoulders relax. And inside the pit of your stomach is an empty hole where the love once was.

You want so badly to press rewind. You want to unsay the things you said. You want them to do the same. And you want nothing more to be in each other’s arms.

Can’t. You just. Go back in time. And un-do it over?

You wish so bad that it never had to get like this. You wish there was a better way.

Is there a better way to return to love?

Maybe if we remembered the horror of the fallout before the bottom drops away. What if we had the resolve to fast-forward to that place of love that the fallout leads to.

What if we considered the fallout as an unnecessary step in the return to love and just… jumped straight there? Would we let each other do this? Would we let ourselves do this?

Or is the fallout necessary? Is turning away from love sometimes necessary for love to reappear?

Just some questions to ponder the next time you foresee an emotional nuclear winter.

P.S. No, my wife and I didn’t get in a huge, knock-down-drag-out fight. I’m a far too perfect husband for this to ever happen:) Just something that’s on my mind right now.


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