Guided by Bewilderment

I know I’m onto something if bewilderment kicks in. If I experience something that leaves me in awe, I know I have to write about it. Because it’s only after I write about it that it becomes more clear.

I start most every piece with one question. It’s only after writing about it that the answer emerges on the page.

Only thing is, the answer usually leads to more questions.

From bewilderment to epiphany to more bewilderment — ad infinitum.

Dancing with bewilderment leads to an infinite supply of epiphanies.

For example, yesterday’s post emerged from a moment I had looking into my daughter’s eyes.

Her eyes are like galaxies. They’re sky blue on the outside and they get green, and then gray towards the pupil.

Sometimes she zones out and stares at me like she’s scanning my soul. This happened the other day and I got to thinking — what’s looking through those eyes?

So I wrote about it in a roundabout way. As I was writing, I started wondering whether the presence that was looking through my eyes was the same presence that was looking through hers. As much as I couldn’t logically justify this, something in me knew it to be true. The words felt right.

This lead to me picturing a creative force that carried both of our bodies through their short lives in this form.

So, basically, I saw God in my daughter’s eyes. Something most every parent can relate to, but something that’s nearly impossible to put into words.

I choose to dance with that bewilderment. To wrestle with it.

Bewilderment, through writing, leads to clarity.


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